OPEN THREAD 20200316

Basically, all legal free speech is allowed. We will assist the authorities in dealing with illegal speech. You are each other’s moderators. Have fun. And don’t forget to MAGA at nuclear levels.

After going through the elements, we now enjoy a sequence of RANDOM somewhat pseudo-random topics that will be thrown out for investigation and commentary on each open thread. At some point, in a way something like composite numbers, I will accidentally hit a second occurrence of one of them – that’s just normal.

Have fun!

Citizen U

(a.k.a. W on the OTHER site)

Day 131 – Formica®

20 thoughts on “OPEN THREAD 20200316

      1. Incidentally, I belong to a club — http://www.baemclub.com — that is dedicated to building model engines. As an example, you might take the well-known flathead Ford — https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_flathead_V8_engine — and build it at 1/4 the actual size.

        This requires that you fabricate the block, boring out the cylinders. You need to turn the pistons on a lathe [one of our members has about a 40 minute talk on making piston rings that is just amazing — the final step is to put ’em in an oven at 1400 degrees for an hour to get the right “springiness”]. None of the 1/4-sized pieces are stock — they have to be fabricated. Some of these projects take years.

        You can adapt some things to use stock parts — tiny little screws and whatnot — just drill ’em the size for what you’ll actually use and thread appropriately. But some things…..if you go into Pep Boys and ask ’em for a 1/4 size sparkplug, they’ll just look at you funny. So you have to build your own. But the white insulator on a spark plug is ceramic, which can’t really be machined………

        So most of the insulators on home-made sparkplugs are machined out of Corian.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. OK, according to Wikipoo, “Formica is a genus of ants of the family Formicidae, commonly known as wood ants, mound ants, thatching ants, and field ants.”

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’d love to see formica with a sort of line-drawing pattern of ants.

    Formic acid (HCOOH) is the original antacid. A simple compound, a carbon with a hydrogen, a double bond with an oxygen, then a single bond to an oxygen which in turn is bonded to a hydrogen.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. SteveinCO had made a late comment in yesterday’s thread about how saying that half of a group is not stupid is just the same as saying that half of that group is stupid. Which reminded me of a non-internet joke from my internal stock.

    Back in the days of sailing ships, a ship pulled into a friendly port. As usual, many of the crew “went to town” and returned late in the evening (or early in the morning). On this particular occasion, the First Mate was one of those enjoying the hospitality and woke up with a splitting hangover. Pulling himself together to meet his obligations as a ship’s officer, he bathed and dressed and presented himself on-time to take over the affairs of the ship for his watch.

    On of the first obligations was review of the ship’s log, where he was dismayed to find the Captain’s notation that “The First Mate was drunk last night.” This was a particularly vicious thing for the Captain to do, because it severely impacted the First Mate’s ability to ever Captain his own ship. He pleaded with the Captain to delete the line, but the Captain told him that it was truthful and part of the official log — and no changes could be done to it. Then he strutted off to his cabin, convinced he had put the First Mate in his place.

    When he took the watch the next day, he was startled to note a log entry that said, simply, “The Captain was sober last night.”

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Formica was invented in 1912 by Westinghouse as a substitute “for mica” — that is to say, a flat, chemically inert, electrically resistant substance. It was comprised of a laminate of paper or textile with a melamine resin. In 1938, American Cyanamid developed a thermosetting melamine resin that kicked Formica into a new era.

    Growing up in the 70s, a substantial amount of the substances I saw or touched were covered with Formica.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I was trying to find images of Northridge Fashion Center from the 70’s, but…..time. Virtually all the railings and such were bright orange Formica. Many of the flat surfaces were black short-loop carpet — ceilings, walls. One of the escalators was enclosed in a carpeted tube with lighting effects.

    Y’know what — if you didn’t live through it, I’ll be wasting a bunch of time trying to convince you that I’m not tripping.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. A man gets in a car accident that completely rips off his penis.

    The doctor says, “Sir, we are going to have to rebuild your penis from scratch. Now, the way we do this operation is to charge you $1,000 for every inch in length. Your insurance company has given you $12,000, and that’s yours to keep, so maybe you want to use all of it, or maybe only 5 or even 4 thousand dollars.”

    The man says, “let me talk with my wife.”

    The next day, the doctor comes back and asks, “so, how long are we making your penis?”

    And the man says, “we’ve decided to go with granite countertops.”

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Jack was dying of old age, and he was on his death bed. suddenly a delicious smell wafted into the room, a smell Jack knew all too well. “Oh, my loving wife, she knows I am dying and she’s cooking my absolute favorite, fresh chocolate chip cookies!”

    Shaking badly, he rolls out of bed and lands on the floor, dislocating his shoulder. With a grunt of pain, he pulls himself to the stairs and slides down them on his belly, he feels muscles being strained and cramping up and he’s in excruciating pain.

    Weakly, and slowly, he crawls toward the kitchen, the smell of the cookies bringing long dormant memories flooding his mind. “Oh, my loving wife, she’s cooked me so many cookies!” Indeed, the countertops were covered in hundreds of chocolate chip cookies.

    With a mixture of agony, nostalgia and joy, a trembling hand stretched out, tears streaming down his cheeks, Jack reaches up to grab a cookie from the counter.

    Suddenly a wooden spoon smacks him sharply on the hand and his wife screeches “JACK! THOSE ARE FOR THE WAKE!!”

    Liked by 2 people

  8. A man hired a contractor to renovate his kitchen.

    The contractor said to the man that he was nearly done.

    The homeowner said “no way that you are – there is a giant hole in the granite countertop!”

    Frustrated with how long the renovation had taken, the homeowner started yelling at the contractor and his assistant, who was standing in the hallway outside of the kitchen, to leave.

    “Get out now!” the man shouted.

    Trying to allay his anger, the contractor asked for the homeowner to calm down and let his assistant into the kitchen with the part he needed.

    “No!” the man replied angrily. “I’m going to sue you!”

    “You’re not letting us finish the work. We’re almost done, we just need to install one last thing, and you are preventing that.” said the contractor.

    “If we cooperate, we can have this house finished and avoid a costly legal battle where we’d both end up worse off.

    Now just let that sink in.”

    Liked by 2 people

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